Sammich 20

These photos are not so much aboot my photographical (New word? Shut your pie hole Webster) skills, aspirations or artistry but more aboot this damn amazing sammich. I do believe that this is the best sammich I have ever made. I basically took your basic meat, egg and cheese that you could find at any crappy diner and upgraded it so it could be served at a really fancy expensive restaurant that I've never been to nor know the name of.

I started by pouring a crap ton of extra virgin olive oil in a pan on low heat. Slice or dice (cut how you please) onion, bell peppers and baby portabellas and sauté/fry/caramelize during the rest of the cooking, stirring occasionally.

Now you could fry the eggs but you'd be stupid.

Start cooking that bacon! You know how to cook bacon right? I used a whole pack for these two sammiches you see here.

At some point you can toast the bread. I took a third of a french baguette, sliced it in half, then smothered in butter and threw it under the broiler. The third that didn't get used will hopefully go stale and be used for french toast. Thats right, you use french bread for french toast.

Now to get back to why you would have been stupid to fry the eggs earlier. First of all you don't even have more then two frying pans do you? Hell you're probably cooking the veggies in a pot aren't ya? Second bacon grease is the best substance to fry eggs on. Pam? Sucks. Butter? Crap. Bacon grease is where it's at. Now I used six eggs, cooked them all together, flipped em, then cut the mass in half for the two sammiches. Again use the amount you want.

There every thing is cooked. Throw it all together so you can pick it up and shove it in your pie hole.


Note: I would like to thank Nate for buying the sammich materials and eating while I took pictures.

I would also like to thank Rachelle and Rachelle's mom for not wanting a sammich and leaving more for me.


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I would like to point out that I have been saying (typing, whatever) sammich and not sandwich. A sandwich is made with bologna, american cheese and white bread. That may be fine for rednecks but should never be served to company.

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Anyone has my permission to make the above described sammich as long as you give props to dreadmuppet the sammich man.





P.S. - I would like to apologize to any rednecks I have offended but your sandwiches suck. Now you know how to make real fook so you have no excuse.



--->All photos are unedited and possibly focused on the wrong subject. Yes you can substitute the bacon with sausage but at that point I'd switch to provolone. Oh yeah, did I forget to mention the fresh mozzarella a smothered those bad boys with? No?



Fresh mozzarella!